Parents -- The Perfect You
Here are 15 ways to help children like themselves
- Reward children. Give praise, recognition,
a special privilege or increased responsibility for a job
well done. Emphasize the good things they do, not the bad.
- Take their ideas, emotions and feelings seriously.
Don’t belittle them by saying, “you’ll
grow out of it” or “it’s not as bad as
- Define limits and rules clearly, and enforce
them. But do allow leeway for your children within
- Be a good role model. Let you children
know that you feel good about yourself. Also, let them see
that you can make mistakes and learn from them.
- Teach your children how to deal with time and
money. Help them spend time wisely and budget their
- Have reasonable expectations for your children.
Help them to set reachable goals so they can achieve success.
- Help your children develop tolerance toward those
with different values, backgrounds and norms. Point
out other people’s strengths.
- Give your children responsibility. They
will feel useful, and valued.
- Be available. Give support when children
- Show them that what they do is important to you.
Talk with them about their activities and interests.
Go to their games, parent’s day at school, drama presentations,
- Express your values, but go beyond “do this”
or “I want you to do that.” Describe
the experiences that determined your values, the decisions
you made to accept certain beliefs, the reasons behind your
- Spend time together. Share favorite
- Discuss problems without placing blame or commenting
on child’s character. If children know that
there is a problem but don’t feel attacked, they are
more likely to help look for a solution.
- Use phrases that build self esteem, such as “Thank
you for helping” or “That was an excellent idea!”
Avoid phrases that hurt self esteem “Why
are you so stupid?” “How many times have I told
15. Show how much you care about them. Hug
them. Tell them they are terrific and that you love them.